And they’re on the same level as my abuser.
Let me explain.
I posted a video on Tik Tok yesterday since I have court today. The video is a montage of pictures and videos of Kirby and Daisy. I made it as a reminder and expression of what I lost. It’s meaningful to me. Anyway, the video has picked up traction and I’ve gotten soooooo much love and support from people learning about my story. And I’ve gotten some haters, as I tend to do, especially since I turned off filtered comments yesterday (that didn’t last long, the comments are filtered again).
People message me and post comments that this is my fault, I let this happen, I watched as he did this to my dogs (this one is my favorite because you are literally acknowledging that he did it but still blaming me, okay), I brought my dogs to him, I failed my dogs, this is all my fault blah blah blah. And I just…I think these people need a hug. Or not, they’re gross, but genuinely. These haters are literally on the exact same level as my abuser and I really do feel sorry for them.
I’ve come to understand why they victim blame. They’re scared and weak-minded. I’ll explain. Victim blaming is a phenomenon that occurs because it’s hard to accept the reality, the truth, that evil exists. That bad things happen, that bad things can happen, and they can happen to you. Hell, it happened to me. And I’m a highly respected member of society – a teacher, 28 with two master’s degrees, never gotten so much as a speeding ticket, and it happened to me. And so they victim blame. Why didn’t you do something? You should’ve left, it was your responsibility to leave and protect those babies and you didn’t. Your fault, your fault, your fault. Because that’s the easy way out. It’s easier to believe that you can simply say “no” and leave pure evil. Because that’s what you want to believe about yourself. That if you were in this evil, evil situation, you’d just leave. Because you’d be able to. Because the evil doesn’t affect you, because it isn’t really that bad. But unfortunately that isn’t the truth.
I’ve also come to realize that just about every single hater is literally just like Mat too. I mean, Trump-loving, racist, anti-masker, etc. Ew. I mean really, you poor, weak-minded things. Mat used to threaten to kill my parents if I supported Black Lives Matter. He said he’d have his dad kill my parents if I so much as spoke to a Black person* (he called them the “N” word which I absolutely will not repeat). I’ve looked at a few profiles of the haters and they look just like Mat’s Facebook. Pro-Trump, anti-love, full of hate. So it makes sense. You have a lot of hate in your heart and soul so it makes sense that you direct that at me.
But, the difference is, to my weak-minded haters, you’re commenting to me. And I’m strong. No like really. S T R O N G. A badass. A boss. I’m stronger than probably anybody you know. And so I read your hate comments and I feel compassion for you. I’m sorry that you are stuck in a place of fear. I’m sorry that you live in denial. I’m sorry that it’s easier for you to side with this evil man who hurts women and animals. That’s really unfortunate for you. And I wish you peace in your heart. I’m sharing my story to help others, to educate about abuse. You can listen to my story but I can’t make you learn anything or change your mind. All I can do is wish you peace and view you with compassion. Because baby, you need it.
Sarah's Story 