I’m dating again for the first time in two years and it’s… surprisingly it’s going well (not to jinx it). I’ve been terrified to date after everything with Mat so I’m very very pleasantly surprised that things are going well. I met a guy and we’ve been dating-ish for almost 2 months now, so I wanted to capture some of that experience.
Early on, he and I were talking on FaceTime and I jokingly told him he should watch a Disney movie that night. Later that night, he texted me saying he started watching Mulan but wasn’t able to finish it before bed. The guy actually watched the Disney movie, like…
He went to the Cubs vs. Rockies game a couple weeks ago with coworkers and he said he was going to wear a blue shirt to support them for me.
He consistently texts me and always asks when we can hang out, and I really appreciate that. We both live our lives independently but make sure we have time to see each other.
We hung out on Saturday and I mentioned that I wanted to go out to a restaurant on a date. He texted me that night saying “dinners on me” and told me to pick where we would go for him to take me out on Tuesday. So, last night we went out on a date like I wanted. I appreciate that.
Last night we went on a date to a pizzeria and/but he had wanted us to go on a double date with his coworker and her fiancé (they weren’t able to). He’s hesitant/nervous/never truly had a committed relationship before so he wants to take things slow, and I completely understand and respect that, so for him to want to introduce me to his friends is a huge step that I appreciate.
I told him I wanted to go to a Rockies game with him, so yesterday he texted and asked if Sunday, May 22 works, and he was going to get us tickets.
As I was telling my therapist about him, I told her one of my friends called things he does “green flags.” My therapist had never heard of that before but loved the idea. Green flags. All these good, healthy things. This is my first time dating in 2 years, since the abuse, and I appreciate the healthiness and slow-and-steady process. Mat had told me he loved me 2 days after we met and started dating. He made me talk to him on the phone for 8 hours a day via video chat. It’s nice to be in a situation where I live my life and he has his life, his career, and we fit the puzzle pieces together. I vent to this new guy about work all the time and he’s so great at listening and being there for me with it. In fact, for our third date, we didn’t have plans. But, I had had a terrible day at work and came home crying. I told him that and he asked if I wanted him to come over and just be with me. And so he did. And I very much appreciate that. Also, that night I ordered us pizza and accidentally had it delivered to my school 20 minutes away. He didn’t hesitate when I asked if he wanted to go pick it up. Man drove 20 minutes with me to see the school where I work and pick up the pizza. Like, good.
Anyway, whatever happens here, I’m so appreciative of the green flags as my friend said. We’re not in a relationship but we are dating and that’s perfect. I’m still testing the waters and learning what dating looks like as I heal, and I’m so happy that it looks like it does right now. I’ve worked hard to get to this place, and I deserve this good, positive experience.
And if you know me IRL, I’ll share more info about this mystery guy if/when things progress, but for now just enjoy the fact that I’m healing and dating again in a positive experience for the first time in two years 🤍❤️
Sarah's Story 