Boy has life been a lot. And finally, finally it’s getting better.
You know about the hardships of the past few months: Connor’s job loss, my traumatic miscarriage, moving and leaving my beloved school community and home in Denver, buying a house, moving, packing up an apartment almost entirely by myself while my husband closed on the house, unpacking an entire house while my husband started a new job, starting a new job myself, setting up my classroom, trial being postponed…it’s been a lot.
And to add on to the list: IDENTITY THEFT.
Yup, the past week and a half I’ve been dealing with identity theft. I filed a police report and have been coping with that. The thieves got all of my information, including pictures of me and pictures of my drivers license, and used my credit card to make a $1500 purchase with Delta Airlines.
So, life has been just a little less than peachy.
I’ve had a really hard time adjusting to my new school community and fitting in, dealing with FOUR preps including AP Spanish Literature that I’ve never taught before, and just overall adjusting. I’ve come home from work crying from frustration and defeat and grief and sadness.
And now, finally, the dark cloud is lifting.
There has been a dark cloud lingering over me for many months now. Life has been a lot and I haven’t been at my best mentally or emotionally.
And now, finally, I’m feeling joy again. Work is getting better and I’m becoming part of the community. I also found out I’m supposed to be getting paid waaaaay more than I thought, which also changes everything.
And now, for the first time since we’ve moved and even made the decision to move here, I am so glad we did. Things aren’t perfect and they’re still adjusting, but I’m feeling joy and happiness at being here. Finally.
We’ve joined a church community and I’ve joined their handbells choir, something I did at my church growing up. I’m looking to start taking piano lessons again and hopefully also volunteer with a DV center in some capacity. We also joined a gym and I’m listing to my audiobook again.
It means the world to get back to these things that fill my cup and bring me joy. And I’m finding the silver lining that I have the opportunity to do these things that I never would have back in Colorado. I loved everything there but life changes.
And with that, I’m also processing my grief.
Coaching. It has been everything to me. I love it and I have loved it for the seven years I’ve been coaching.
And, the reality is that my time coaching was coming to an end. I’ve felt a lot of grief over leaving that community, but the truth is, my time was done anyway. I was pregnant. My baby was due in November – literally the day the swim season would start. So regardless of the reason why, my time coaching was ending. And I’ve felt grief about it because it was me leaving, but I would’ve been done coaching anyway with the baby. As I told my mom, I had already been called away from that path. And, the other truth is, I wouldn’t have left on my own accord. Heck, I had been figuring out ways to coach throughout maternity leave. Clearly I needed out but wouldn’t have done it on my own. And now because of it, I have time to be myself. To do things for me. Things that bring me joy and make me a better person. Like I’m doing my husband’s laundry and making him lunch to bring to work every day. Because I have the time and energy and it makes me happy to help him out in those little ways.
It feels like the tide has changed.
The dark cloud has shadowed over me and my life for many months now and here it is, the sun shines through yet again, always. I’m finally getting back to myself. Finally.
Sarah's Story 