Yesterday, my abuser and the man who killed both of my dogs, Mathew Berry, pleaded guilty to the animal cruelty crime he committed against Kirby on June 23, 2020.
I delivered an impact statement, and I’m sure I’ll share that in written form here soon but for now, know that it served its purpose and made an impact. The Judge listened intently as I spoke and from what my family said, you could’ve heard a pin drop from how the entire court room stopped and listened to every word I said.
And then the Judge admonished Mathew. It was basically shared in courtroom-appropriate language that there is something SERIOUSLY wrong with him and that what he did is SICK. This Judge, as have others, called this the toughest case he’s seen in his entire career.
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Last night, I stayed at my parents’ house. And this morning I woke up with the eerie feeling of remembrance and grief. Because over four years ago, the night that my abuser killed Kirby, I slept in this house. I had fallen asleep on the couch as my dad took Kirby’s body to the vet. And I was on that couch when I woke up and heard my mom talking to my dad on the phone as he said the vet was urging us to call the police.
Yesterday, that vet personnel came to court and she sat right beside me through the whole thing. She sat next to me as together we heard Mathew Berry, when asked how he pleaded to the crime of animal cruelty, say, “Guilty.”
I wrote her a letter after I had escaped from Mathew and told her thank you for saving my life. And I meant it then and I mean it now.
So this morning, I woke up on the couch (after a night of pregnancy ill but that’s fine) and was just in remembrance. Here we are. Mathew Berry pleaded guilty to what he did to Kirby on that day. How far we’ve come from that night.
It makes me wish I could go back to that terrified, traumatized young woman who listened to her dad say people are telling us to call the police, terrified knowing that the man who had just killed her dog would also kill her parents if he felt threatened. I would go back and give her a hug. I would hold her hand and tell her this is hard and scary but we are you. You’ve got this. You will make it through and this journey will be long and hard. It will wear on you in ways that bring you to your worst and lowest times. But we are you and the strong I am now has always, always been inside you. And I would show her this: that on that night as she lay terrified of the notion of involving police, we took that as power and used it against Mathew. And got him convicted. CONVICTED! Convicted of what he did to Kirby.
Hearing the prosecutor read every crime and act of abuse that Mathew inflicted against Kirby as Mathew stood there listening was just sweet, sweet justice. Because Mathew had tried to cover it up. He has denied it for four years. But yesterday he pleaded guilty. And stood as he faced the truth of what he did.
And do you know why?
Because of me. BECAUSE OF ME. !!!!
He stood there and faced his crime(s) BECAUSE. OF. ME.
As a victim to survivor, that is SO. INCREDIBLY. POWERFUL.
I did it. Kirby and Daisy, this is for you. For us. My heroes. I have loved you every minute that I have known you, both on this earth and in the beyond. This was for you and through that love.
Finally.
Sarah's Story 