Tag Archives: domestic violence

I removed the post: my statement to police of the day MB killed Kirby

That day was by far the worst day of my life. A year and a half ago, on the 1 year anniversary of that day, I made a blog post sharing the statement I provided police of everything that happened that day. It’s gruesome. And yesterday, I removed it. From time to time, I getContinue reading “I removed the post: my statement to police of the day MB killed Kirby”

Victim Blamers Need Murder to Understand Abuse

I said it. Victim blamers need the victim to be murdered to understand the power of abuse. Until then, they hold the victim as responsible for being abused instead of the abuser for abusing. So here’s my reflection: I have received more support than ever, especially lately, especially now that Mathew Berry has been chargedContinue reading “Victim Blamers Need Murder to Understand Abuse”

I had a panic attack last night {triggered}

And I haven’t had one of those in a while. I was triggered and I felt my body go into the freeze mode it always did when I was terrified for my life around Mat. My boyfriend is so great but his driving gives me severe anxiety and ultimately it led to a panic attackContinue reading “I had a panic attack last night {triggered}”

New Job + More Therapy

Let’s start with the good: I got a new job!!!! I’ve had 3-4 high schools interested in me and this week I was a finalist at two of the high schools. One of them offered me the position and before I accepted, I asked if I could go on a tour of the building. TheyContinue reading “New Job + More Therapy”

It’s not over yet

Jeremiah 29:11 was the scripture verse on my devotional card this morning. “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Plans not to harm you. My God blesses me. My God is good toContinue reading “It’s not over yet”

My abuser is banned from talking to the Judge in our court case 😳

Yep, as of today. Like there’s an official court order prohibiting Mat from communicating with our judge. On February 2, Mat emailed the Judge in our case. He said this: “So Sarah Manos has given out my person information to the point I had to change my number and did over 3,000 in damages toContinue reading “My abuser is banned from talking to the Judge in our court case 😳”

“I hope you can move on”

That’s something I’ve heard on more than one occasion from people close to me, namely family members. It came from a place of love but this idea, that statement, is very harmful. For the REST of my LIFE, I will carry this trauma with me. Until the day I die. It will forever and alwaysContinue reading ““I hope you can move on””

This time is different.

^ Quote from my therapist I was telling her how anxious I was about filing this police report and nervous and scared of it being the same as the last time I was so hurt and traumatized by the system. And she said, “this time is different, it’s not the same experience.” And that comfortsContinue reading “This time is different.”

One last fight.

I don’t want any judgement or negativity because this is my life, my dogs were killed and died in my arms, this is my fight. I filed a police report in Mokena yesterday. Yeah, I flew into Chicago for the day, drove down to Mokena, filed a police report, and flew home. It was aContinue reading “One last fight.”