Tag Archives: personal

This time is different.

^ Quote from my therapist I was telling her how anxious I was about filing this police report and nervous and scared of it being the same as the last time I was so hurt and traumatized by the system. And she said, “this time is different, it’s not the same experience.” And that comfortsContinue reading “This time is different.”

One last fight.

I don’t want any judgement or negativity because this is my life, my dogs were killed and died in my arms, this is my fight. I filed a police report in Mokena yesterday. Yeah, I flew into Chicago for the day, drove down to Mokena, filed a police report, and flew home. It was aContinue reading “One last fight.”

I’m saving lives.

I’m crying and I’ll add more to this post soon but I’m saving lives and I can’t tell you what that means to me. With everything, the injustice system not pressing charges against Mat, the bullshit we’re dealing with in court with this lawsuit, none of that matters because I’m saving lives. I’m telling myContinue reading “I’m saving lives.”

I’m angry. Angrier than I thought. Fuck the system.

I’m so angry. I’m so hurt. Fuck the system. Fuck Kim Foxx. Fuck the prosecutors who victim blamed. Fuck them. I’m angry. And hurt. And I need to talk about it. Or write about it for now (I have therapy tomorrow night). I’m so angry and hurt I feel myself coming to tears. On Tuesday,Continue reading “I’m angry. Angrier than I thought. Fuck the system.”

I am the sun ☀️

In therapy this week, I reprocessed some of my trauma and how I was triggered into feeling paralyzing fear when my dog Rosie jumped on my lap as I drove the other day. It brought me right back to the day Mat killed Kirby, because that morning, as I drove to Mat’s house, Kirby jumpedContinue reading “I am the sun ☀️”

When the victim blaming comments don’t impact me

I was checking my filtered comments on Tik Tok this morning and saw somebody commented that I “ate Mexican food while he killed Kirby” and therefore get no sympathy from this person because I put my boyfriend before my dog. And to that, I say: yes, I ate Mexican food that day. I’m incredibly proudContinue reading “When the victim blaming comments don’t impact me”

Rosie went to the vet & I still grieve Daisy HARD.

Rosie wasn’t feeling well this week. I emailed the vet on Tuesday night and asked if I could bring her in this weekend. They wrote back on Wednesday morning saying they’d prefer to see her as soon as possible with her symptoms and they had an opening for that afternoon. I took it and toldContinue reading “Rosie went to the vet & I still grieve Daisy HARD.”

I’m not doing ok, but I’m fine

It’s situational. And it’s trauma, and I accept that and I’m in therapy to cope with it, so I’m ok. I accept the hurt and pain and grief (that’s the hardest one) and allow myself to feel it when the feeling comes up. And as for situational, I hate my job, I’m suffering there, andContinue reading “I’m not doing ok, but I’m fine”