I saw my abuser in person in court. Obviously. And I’m reflecting on that. That man, that human being, wants nothing to do with me now, except maybe to harm me and get me off his back as I’ve shouted his ugly truth to the world. And for a time in our lives, that humanContinue reading “Looking at my abuser + PTSD”
Tag Archives: PTSD
It’s 3am and I’m reflecting on my story (my abuser is pleading guilty to animal cruelty this week)
It’s 3am and I can’t sleep, but that’s typical these days. And when it’s 3am and I can’t sleep, my mind wanders. And it usually wanders to my story. To Court. To what lies ahead this week. And today, now, this 3am brings me back to my story. Particularly Daisy. And I’m beginning to cry,Continue reading “It’s 3am and I’m reflecting on my story (my abuser is pleading guilty to animal cruelty this week)”
The worst trauma is fear
I woke up this morning feeling very reflective. It started right when I woke up. Most people wake up in the morning and check their phones or get up and brush their teeth or whatever to start their day. Maybe before any of that they just lay there and stretch that big comfy stretch whenContinue reading “The worst trauma is fear”
Sometimes I think about the horror
TW: animal abuse Sometimes I think about the horror of what he did. Listen, I’ve gone through a LOT of therapy. I’m in a good place. And, the fact stands that I experienced true horror and that is part of my story. Of our story. So sometimes I think about the horror. The cruelty. SometimesContinue reading “Sometimes I think about the horror”
I filed a police report last week
I’m 100% sure my abuser is violating my order of protection…again. Let’s rewind: You know I’m active on social media – Tik Tok, especially. It’s been amazing to share my story and help so many while educating about domestic abuse and animal abuse. I’ve also been in the news plenty of times. My abuser, whoContinue reading “I filed a police report last week”
I had a panic attack last night {triggered}
And I haven’t had one of those in a while. I was triggered and I felt my body go into the freeze mode it always did when I was terrified for my life around Mat. My boyfriend is so great but his driving gives me severe anxiety and ultimately it led to a panic attackContinue reading “I had a panic attack last night {triggered}”
Trauma + Grief + “this is my story”
My sister sent me a memory on Snapchat the other day. 3 clips. Each one was her playing and cuddling with Kirby. And it absolutely shattered my heart. My sister there with Kirby, love as pure as light. 5 years ago. And all I could think about was how Mathew Berry so cruelly, so horrifically,Continue reading “Trauma + Grief + “this is my story””
New Job + More Therapy
Let’s start with the good: I got a new job!!!! I’ve had 3-4 high schools interested in me and this week I was a finalist at two of the high schools. One of them offered me the position and before I accepted, I asked if I could go on a tour of the building. TheyContinue reading “New Job + More Therapy”
Hate + Mental Health
I swear I always get the most hate on Tik Tok when my mental health isn’t as strong as it can be, or maybe it’s just that I feel it the most during these times. Anyway, I’m filtering my comments again because I don’t need to be reading people’s insecurities and internalized misogyny when theyContinue reading “Hate + Mental Health”
A year ago I wanted to die. And tonight I danced.
Tonight I got up and danced. Well first I worked out and then I jammed to my music and just danced. And it felt good. A year ago I wanted to die. Literally. I remember sitting in my car, sobbing, because I didn’t want to be alive. I wanted to die. I wanted to beContinue reading “A year ago I wanted to die. And tonight I danced.”
Sarah's Story 